On Tests

I'm thinking of taking the GRE and going back to school (again, I'm a school junkie). As I've gone to little, private schools I've not needed the GRE before...so I'm reading up about all the math that has leaked away from my brain in the last few years.

As I'm thinking about tests, I was reminded of a difficult test adventure I had when I was little. Little enough to enjoy recess and little enough that I blindly followed authority figures (oh the things that change and the things that stay the same...) in elementary school.

We were having a standardized test in the afternoon one day right after lunch. I like taking tests, so I was excited with my little pencils all lined up. Things were fine until I had to pee. I was the age where I was too old to be wetting myself but still young enough that I sometimes didn't have lots of "I NEED TO PEE" warning. An awkard age, really. In the middle of the multiple choice section, I went up to the teacher's desk and said "I need to go to the bathroom." She said something along the lines of "I told you this morning, you can't leave once the test started. You'll need to wait until your done with the test."

Abashed, I went back to my seat and filled out more bubbles. I moved onto shapes or numbers or something and kept filling away with my lucky No. 2 pencil. After a while, I REALLY had to go. I went back to the teacher and asked in more urgent tones about going to the bathroom. Again, I was chastised for not peeing during lunch (though I didn't have to pee then).

It was halfway through the sciencey section I think when my bladder took over and, annoyed with my management, solved the problem warmly and damply. I felt much better. I finished my test, tied my sweater around my waist and went up to the teacher. In a very matter-of-fact tone I said something along the lines of "Here's my test. I wet myself. Can I go home?" The poor teacher was mortified at what happens when you repeatedly refuse a pee break and abashedly sent me home for the rest of the day. And thus began a lifetime of telling authority figures to fuck off if they don't like my pee schedule.

An Erinku:
Pumpkin seeds
roasting in kitchen
be done be done
be done be done