Oasis

When I was in late high school, 17 or 18 or so, I had the worst nightmare I've ever had. It wasn't sinister. It didn't involved being chased. In my dream, I was standing in my kitchen alone when I realized that the past six years of my life had been a complete delusion. And that the world I thought was real was vastly, fundamentally different from the real world. Some of my closest family and friends had died in the "real" world and I wasn't able to cope, so I'd created a fantasy world I'd been living in.

When I woke up from that dream, I was horrified and instantly set about finding these folks who had been dead while I dreamed. Insidious dream-logic can pervade the real world and I was completely freaked out. It turned out everyone was alive and well. It was, after all, a dream.

Now I'm in my 30's and have been getting my ass kicked daily by life. This past week was very rough and, again, I realized that the life I thought I'd been living for the last six or so years was an illusion. Much like walking in the heat and seeing the oasis of an ice cream stand on the horizon, my ice cream stand has melted. It sounded awfully familiar, so, I've tested and I do seem to currently be in real life. Disillusionment sucks but is theoretically good in the long-term.

Today, I was angry. This has been a very welcome change of pace from the dreadful apathy I'd been feeling for days. Unfortunately, anger doesn't fix my cello scales. But ice cream sure sounds like a great antidote.

An Erinku (like a bobsled, but with words):
plastic bag
huddled on floor
containing
no candy